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Trudi Daniels (@TrudiDan) & Marc Fellhauer (@MarcFell) are here today! Amazon’s “essential” items, Oakland County police chase, Scientology v. Coronavirus, HBO’s new doc ‘The Scheme’, Andrew Cuomo’s gonna be laying pipe, a new Bonerline, the worst influencer, and when a towel should be washed. Drew’s long wait at the drive-thru pharmacy was made worse by not having his phone charger with him. Our Facebook live today was loaded up with content and camera changes. Some people are saying that Justin Long is claiming COVID-19 to boost his podcast rankings. Marc is destroying the environment & Drew’s washing machine with his one-time towel use policy. Larry David had the most sensical PSA we’ve seen yet. Charlie LeDuff has a new story in the LA Times about the Coronavirus’ impact on Detroit. Gretchen Whitmer was confirmed to be in Joe Biden’s binder of women that he’s considering to be his running mate. Hunter Biden’s girlfriend gave birth to another kid making Joe a happy grandfather all over again. OJ Simpson is with Maz on the Tiger King hate, but he’s still got jokes and no sense of irony. A police chase in Oakland County started off slow, but then had a vicious ending for the driver being chased. Florida Governor Ron DeSantis has finally issued a shelter in place order… slow down. 70 University of Texas students defied the request to not go on Spring Break last week… and now 28 have tested positive for COVID-19. It’s revealed that Trudi reads smallpox books for fun in her spare time. Jose Fernandez never did get his statue. What do addicts do during a pandemic? Some assume they act exactly the same. David Miscavige is furious that anybody would tell him what to do, especially on LRH’s birthday which is now cancelled due to Coronavirus. A man in Germany attempted to keep people home by buying up billboards & plastering them with spoilers to Netflix’s hottest shows. With people not getting in their cars daily anymore, radio is taking a hit & Beasley had to let some people go nationwide. A Hazel Park man killed his wife & then cuddled her corpse for a week before police discovered the couple during a welfare check. Drew is getting so starved for content that he watched a documentary about some homeless dude sailing around the world called Chasing Bubbles. HBO has a new documentary called . The Scheme about the FBI investigation into paying college basketball players. Our favorite documentary participator Dan Wetzel even show up in the film The Jeffrey Epstein stories keep coming out from the new book by the victim’s lawyer. Workers at the Amazon warehouse in Romulus walked out of work after another worker tested positive for Coronavirus. Some of them even feel dildos aren’t essential during a pandemic. Dogs, Trudi, Cable TV & Zoom are the big winners of the Coronavirus. The video communications company Zoom is doing great, but thanks to idiots the Chinese company Zoom is also killing it. The YMCA in Buffalo did a live family story time that got interrupted by trolls & now the FBI is getting involved. The Coronavirus is now the 3rd most common cause of death in the US behind cancer, heart disease & vending machines. Andrew Cuomo’s ex Sandra Lee is denying the existence of the governor’s nipple rings & is going so far to call the comments body shaming. He’s also very single and has women in NYC thirsting for him. Massive snitch Tekashi 6ix9ine is getting out of prison due to his asthma making him more at risk for Coronavirus. An inmate at Kwame Kirkpatrick’s prison in Louisiana died of Coronavirus. Don Lemon started balling on his show thinking about Chris Cuomo’s COVID-19 diagnosis. Breaking News: Audio of the dildo handler at the Amazon warehouse has been released & the outrage in his voice is palpable. Elvis Costello is jumping on the trend of doing an online concert/lecture to entertain people while they’re stuck at home. Miley Cyrus started an Instagram talk show that has somehow managed to not podfade out of existence already. Boner Line callers got some of the latest Coronavirus songs stuck in their heads & called/texted (209)-66-BONER to complain. AMC Star Southfield is closing permanently after being the AMC flagship theater for years. Influencers are whining about lost income after advertisers slashed marketing in response to the pandemic. Jessy Taylor is nothing without her following & barely anything with it. It somehow doesn’t stop people from wasting money buying Cameo’s from the wannabe influencer. At least some people are doing things to help out others & this time it’s the Texas Rangers’ Shin-Soo Choo. Cruise Ships are totally screwed right now. Michigan now has over 10k confirmed cases of the Coronavirus with over 300 confirmed deaths. Elon Musk donated a bunch of respirators to a hospital & people immediately started ragging on him because they were CPAP machines, not ventilators. After hitting the 2-hour mark Drew is burnt out & Marc needs to finish his laundry. Tara Reade’s sexual assault allegations are getting completely buried in pandemic news.